Cars have always been where I felt safest throughout my life.
In the past, cars have been a home when my body has not, a refuge when my bedroom was not, a party when the club was not; an escape, shelter, security.
Cars can injure or kill, cars pollute, a symbol of insatiable and transmogrifying capitalism, the enemy of our natural environment. Cars have the potential to be dangerous, but they rarely are for me.
I have not felt protected for a long time.
Memories can cut and draw blood; the memories attached to my experiences in cars are indelible, painful, vivid, imagined.
Sometimes when the doors lock, it seals my memories.
Shielded from rain with friends.
Feeling lust’s cool thrill in summer heat with the air con on.
Looking out as if from a space shuttle at a foreign world blanketed by snow.
Lip-bitten desire. Daft Punk spilling out the speakers. Getting lost. Laughing.
Long road trips; taking the scenic route to Manchester and back again.
Sudden arousal; sudden sadness. Talking shit in a rented vehicle.
Highways and meadows. Windows down and speeding thru Brixton.
It can be like a home, a nomad’s home, endlessly travelling and unrooted. I feel unrooted 88% of the time anyway. It can feel like the car was meant for me.
Sometimes it feels like cars are meant for memories.»
credits
released November 5, 2021
Recorded between October 2020 & January 2021
in Croydon, South- & Greater London GB
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